Divorce is always a sticky thing. But it cannot get any more difficult if there are children involved. My parents divorced when I was 7 years old (there was alcoholism involved) and from then on my brother and I stayed with my mom during the week and saw our dad every other weekend, sometimes during the week. It was hard, yet in our situation quite necessary.
Even till this day it is very common, even if both parents are stable, to give the main custody to the mother…father happens to be out of luck.
I recently came across an article which brought all of those childhood memories back.The Czech custody laws have been recently changing with the court system being more sympathetic to the father. There are cases where he was even given a joint custody!
‘The Czech Republic has one of the highest divorce rates in Europe with one in three marriages –and every second marriage in Prague – hitting the rocks.’ If this new trend of joint custody is going to stay, it will affect the majority of the future generation.
The Czech family and child therapist Petra Winette does not seem to like the new trend:
“it seems that all these decisions and procedures are made in favour of the parents –if you look at the child and consider child development issues we see a very different picture. It is common knowledge that a child needs to have a stable environment, a safe home, needs to have his or her needs met by those closest to him. The neurological development of a child’s brain requires a lot of stability and predictability and joint custody does not really provide that. So we are seeing kids who are having to cope with a situation which is not appropriate for them in terms of their development.”
The US custody laws are very different from those in Czech. Mothers are not given an advantage before fathers; the custody usually ends up being a fair share. I can’t even imagine going through that as a child. I had my one home and one room, with all of my things. When I was staying with my dad, I would pack a backpack and sleep on a daybed in his kitchen (he had a studio) which worked pretty well. Of course, my dad was an animal lover like me, so he always had pets. So when it was time for me to go home it was clearly hard to leave those behind as well.
What do you thing? What should the law be? Equal custody for both parents or should one parent have the larger slice of caretaking? I personally thing that although both parents are very important, little children should spend more time with their mother because they are simply better care takers. Once the children are older then the custody could be split in half. Either way, I don’t think there is a win-win situation; those children will always walk through their life with an arrow in their hearts.
(sorry my link insertion button is not working so I have to post it under the article like in old times)If you liked this post buy me a coffee! (Suggested:$3 a latte $8 for a pound) Thanks!